man on sailboat

I’m going to be honest and say that I’m tired of talking about dating. This website was created in order to help guys realize that there’s more to life than just worrying about getting laid. The focus was to help guys realize that we all have deep-rooted issues that are affecting all our lives in a negative way. Many of these issues were developed while growing up due to traumatic experiences such as bullying, rejection, being called horrible names and even neglect.

The typical way that men try to overcome their social problems is to learn how to pick up women. Instead of overcoming their fears they fake it, learning memorized story lines. Many men don’t have a life outside of their job because they just don’t know how to be social and can’t really connect with others.  Look at how many friends that women have compared to men.

Women are able to not only connect with others on an emotional level but able to make much closer friendships. This is because as men are growing up  our fathers and family members will tell us to stop crying like a little girl. Don’t be so sensitive. Take it like a man. Men aren’t allowed to complain. And the list goes on and on. We learn how to disconnect with our feelings and instead run on autopilot. Being afraid to open up to others and tell them how we feel out of ridicule is like a security blanket. If we don’t open up about our true feelings there’s no way anybody can call us names or laugh at us.

What we need to understand guys is that it’s not going to be easy to change overnight. It’s going to be hard work eliminating bad social habits that we picked up over the years. None of us are perfect and sometimes need help from others in order to overcome our problems. That’s why it’s important to seek out the help of others who have either overcome these problems themselves or are a qualified expert that specializes in what you are going through. You don’t have to go through the pain and suffering that you’re feeling inside alone. I know because I’ve been there myself.

The dateless years. Lonely nights at home watching television. Depression. Just like you guys I’ve felt it also. When it feels like there’s no way out it can be very depressing with the feeling that the whole world is out to get you.  It works on your mind and ruins any hope you have of being happy. You start to think that maybe the whole world has a conspiracy against you and won’t be happy until you are completely miserable.

I discovered that the less you think about dating the better you will feel. Thinking about dating all the time is a huge burden. Like a huge sandbag on your shoulders that you have to walk around with. After a while this huge burden gets heavy and you just can’t seem to handle the weight of it anymore. Everywhere you go you see attractive women that you just wish you could somehow meet and possibly get a date. You keep running different scenarios through your mind as to what would happen if this out of reach event were to occur. Then the harsh reality hits and you realize that this isn’t going to happen.

Men need to start focusing on other important things in their life besides dating. Focusing on other stuff will take away the stress of worrying about whether you’ll be good enough for the woman you’re eyeballing. No more worrying about being tall or good-looking enough. Your mind will be occupied with what you’re doing and how much fun you’re having. Doing stuff that you enjoy will also relieve depression and improve your social skills. Plus you’ll learn by trying new things that you never experienced before. This can take shape in many different ways. Can be from taking some college courses you’ve never had time for. Learning how to cook. Sailing. Joining an exercise class. Traveling. Anything that you feel a deep desire for can create a more meaningful life and lift the unhappiness. Plus you never know. Women might see that you’re having so much fun that they might even join in.

From now on I’ll be focusing on the things that truly enhance men’s lives and less on the dating which, in my opinion is one-dimensional.